Monday, April 25, 2016

Three Quotes on Privilege

"Privilege is when you think something is not a problem because it is not a problem to you personally." -- Unattributed
"Privilege is least apparent to those who have it." -- Clarence Page
"When you're accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression." -- Unattributed

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

A Radical View of Power

According to NYU professor Steven Lukes, power is the capacity to bring about consequences. In a social context, there are 3 faces or dimensions of power:

1 Overt Power is the power to make decisions during conflict.

2) Covert Power is the power to control the agenda, by deciding to ignore or deflect existing grievances. It is the power to transform potential challenges about inequitable outcomes into non-decisions. This is maintained by a ‘mobilization of bias” – a dominant set of beliefs, values, and institutional processes and procedures that privilege some groups in relation to others.

3) Ideological power is the power to shape desires and beliefs, making people want things opposed to their own self-interest and thereby averting open conflict and grievances. It is the power to transform inequities into non-issues. It can be at work despite apparent consensus between the powerful and the powerless.

Thursday, April 14, 2016

The Alienation of Capitalist Work



Marx is best known for his two unsparing critiques of capitalism: capitalism is essentially alienating and exploitative.

Capitalism is alienating in 3 specific ways:

1. Workers are alienated from other human beings.
Workers must compete with each other for jobs and raises. But competition between workers brings down wages. This is not only materially damaging to workers, it estranges them from each other.

2. Workers are alienated from the products of their labor.
Capitalists need not do any labor themselves – simply by owning the means of production, they control the profit of the firm they own, and are enriched by it. But they can only make profit by selling commodities, which are entirely produced by workers. Thus, the products of the worker’s labor strengthen the capitalists, whose interests are opposed to that of the proletariat. Workers do this as laborers, but also as consumers: Whenever laborers buy commodities from capitalists, that also strengthens the position of the capitalists.

3. Workers are alienated from the act of labor.
Because capitalists own the firms that employ workers, it is they, not the workers, who decide what commodities are made, how they are made, and in what working conditions they are made. As a result, work is often dreary, repetitive, and even dangerous. Enduring this for an extended period of time means that one can only look for fulfillment outside of one’s work; while “the activity of working, which is potentially the source of human self-definition and human freedom, is … degraded to a necessity for staying alive.” As Marx says, "In his work, therefore, he [the laborer] does not affirm himself but denies himself, does not feel content but unhappy, does not develop freely his physical and mental energy but mortifies his body and ruins his mind. The worker therefore only feels himself outside of work, and in his work feels outside himself. He is at home when he is not working, and when he is working he is not at home.

Source: Karl Marx's Concept of Alienation

The role that ideas play in shaping us as human beings



"We design human nature by designing the institutions within which people live and work."

How to practice emotional first aid

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

"Education is the not the filling of a bucket but the lighting of a fire."

Parenting with Finesse

1. React to "shockers" with semi-interested boredom. When children announce something to which you feel an instant reaction in your gut take a deep breath, smile calmly, and say, "Really? Tell me more."

2. Act as if there is all the time in the world, even when there isn't.

3. Notice the little details and acknowledge them.

4. Show humility. Apologize when you're wrong, say "I don't know" when you don't know.

Source

Ten Things Great Parents Do

1. Do what you say you are going to do.
Don't make rules you can't enforce consistently and keep your commitments. Kids need to know that you mean what you say; this builds trust and respect.
2. Catch kids being good, and tell them specifically what you liked.

3. Harness the power of natural consequences.

4. Practice positive touch (e.g., hugs, loving pats, cuddles)

5. Make a clear distinction between kids and their behavior.
Always communicate with your words and actions that you love them no matter what, even if you don't like their behavior.

6. Show them the way.
Punishment only suppresses behavior. Tell kids the behavior you want to see and then praise it specifically.

7. Beware over-functioning for your kids.
Making mistakes and experiencing failure and disappointment are essential life experiences that provide the opportunity for kids to learn and practice good coping skills.

8. Avoid disciplining kids when they are hungry or tired.

9. Teach kids the 3 P's: practice, patience, and perseverance.

10. Help kids learn to feel their feelings and choose their actions.
Coach kids in how to respond (versus react). It's okay to feel whatever they're feeling, but it may not be okay to follow their feelings into action (e.g., hitting, yelling).

Source: Erica Reischer, PhD

Thursday, April 7, 2016

Key Sociological Concepts

Accommodation: acceptance of their relative positions in a social situation by both the minority and dominant groups.

Acculturation: acceptance of dominant group's values by minority-group members.

Alienation: feelings of powerlessness, meaninglessness, and social isolation associated with certain social relationships.

Ascribed Status: a social position that is assigned to persons by society or by birth, such as age, sex, or race.

Assimilation: the process by which an entire culture is altered in important respects so as to conform to a dominant culture. Gradual loss of distinctiveness of minority groups absorbed into dominant population. The process by which minority groups are absorbed into dominant population. The process by which minority groups acquire the sociocultural patterns of the dominant group, which involves both cultural assimilation--the learning of day to day norms of a dominant group by minority group members and their internationalization of the dominant group's values, beliefs and ideas.

Cultural Pluralism: a pattern of ethnic group relations in which each ethnic group retains its fundamental values and norms incorporated from elements from the others.

Ethnocentrism: the attitude that one's own culture is superior to others, that one's own beliefs, values, and behavior are more correct than others; and that other people and cultures can be evaluated in terms of one's own culture. A tendency to understand the world only from the viewpoint of one's own culture.

Folkways: norms generally regarded as useful, but not essential for society; violation of these norms may bring about only mild censure or punishment.

Identity: a commitment to normative standards that allow observers to place us in relation to others and to expect certain behaviors from us.

Laws: norms formally chosen to be backed up by punishments for failure to conform to them, with particular social agencies designated to do the enforcing.

Mores: norms generally regarded as essential for the welfare of society and associated with strong feelings of right or wrong, violations of which inspire intense reaction and some type of punishment.

Norm: rules or expectations defining acceptable or required behaviors of individuals in social situations; norms are recognized by group members as essential to group maintenance.

Paternalistic Relationships (patriarchy): relationships in which one group (male-dominated) is subservient to another, given little responsibility, and has its basic needs provided for.

Power: the ability to achieve desired ends despite opposition. Ability to get others to do something that they wouldn't ordinarily do.

Social Control: attempts by society to regulate thoughts behaviors of individuals.

Social Movement: an organized effort to encourage or oppose some dimension of change.

Stigma: a powerful negative label that radically changes a person's self concept and social identity.

Symbol: anything that carries a particular meaning recognized by people who share culture.

Values: culturally defined standards of desirability, goodness, and beauty that serve as broad guidelines for social life.

From https://www.sonoma.edu/users/l/leeder/pages/concepts.htm

Racism without Racists Chapter 3: The Style of Color Blindness

How to talk nasty about minorities without sounding racist...

1. Calling blacks "nigger" softly: racism without racial epithets
When people of color were property or regarded as secondary human beings, there was no reason to be concerned in talking about them. The Civil Rights era shattered norms about public discussions on race. Public discussions are careful, indirect, hesitant, and occasionally in coded language.

2. Using a rhetorical maze
Semantic moves used by whites include apparent denials ("I don't believe that, but..." or "I am not prejudiced, but...")

3. Projection: "They are the racist ones..."

4. Diminutives: "It makes me a little angry..."
Few whites say, "I am against affirmative action" or "I am against interracial marriage"; instead, they say something such as "I am just a little bit against affirmative action" or "I am just a bit concerned about the welfare of the children."

5. Rhetorical Incoherence: "I, I, I don't mean, you know, but..."

Racism without Racists Chapter 2: The Central Frames of Color Blind Racism

The ideology of color blind racism engages in blaming the victim in an indirect "now you see it, now you don't" style.

The central component is its frames, or set paths for interpreting information. They explain racial phenomena following a predictable route. They misrepresent the world (hide the fact of dominance) but often are founded on some truth.

Classic European liberalism is defined by individualism, universalism, egalitarianism, and meliorism (the idea that people and institutions can be improved). It was the philosophy of a nascent, aspiring ruling class in early modern capitalism: the bourgeoisie, the middle-class owners of property. The bourgeois goals were only extended to the populace in the middle 20th century, and it was never extended to the countries that European powers used for raw materials and workers.

This liberal tradition informed the racist policies of the United States: slavery, the relocation of Native Americans to reservations, the utilization of Mexicans and various Asian groups as contract laborers, and Jim Crow.

Even though disenfranchised groups used liberal rhetoric to advance social and legal reforms (e.g., Civil Rights Movement, National Organization for Women), the central elements of liberalism have been re-articulated to rationalize racially unfair situations in America today.

There are four central frames of color blind racism:
1. Abstract liberalism uses ideas associated with political liberalism (e.g., equal opportunity) and economic liberalism (e.g, individual choice) to explain racial matters.
2. Naturalization explains away racial phenomena by suggesting they are natural occurrences, such as "segregation is natural because all backgrounds gravitate toward likeness."
3. Cultural racism explains the standing of minorities in society using culturally based arguments, such as "Mexicans do not put much emphasis on education."
4. Minimization of racism suggests discrimination is no longer a central factor affecting minorities' life chances.

By framing race-related issues in the language of liberalism, whites appear reasonable opposing all practical approaches to dealing with de facto racial inequality.








Things I've Liked This Week



* Listening to Ashok Kondabolu on the Sporkful podcast.
* Watching interviews of Jill Soloway, Rachel Bloom, and Sara Bareilles on HuffPo Conversations (on Hulu).
* Playing basketball at the playground across the street.
* Going to the Richmond Plunge with Adi on a 90 degree day.
* Watching Brian Copeland perform The Waiting Period at The Marsh in SF (for free!).
* Watching the game winning shot in the NCAA Men's Basketball Championship.
* Eating Misr Wat Jess made from this recipe.
* Going to the Berkley Marina for free compost and stumbling upon South Asian families flying kites and local kids LARPing with fantastic cosplay.
* Reading the Op-ed piece When Whites Just Don't Get It, Part 6 by Nicholas Kristof and falling down the hyperlink rabbit hole.
* Andrew Reiner's call to (softer) arms: Bros, it's time to push back against conventional male stereotypes.

Sound Relationship Advice

1. "Turn toward" the people we care about when they make "bids for attention."

For example, you might tell your spouse, or another person you care about, "I learned something really cool today." You hope that he or she will "turn toward" you by replying with something like, "Oh? Tell me about it," as opposed to shutting you down: "Can't you see I'm busy?!!!"

2. Politely turn down bids for attention.

Demonstrate interest in what the people you care about have to say, but make clear the practical limits on your time and attention.

3. "Maintain your bearing" in stressful negative situations. In other words, don't freak out.

4. It's okay to screw up... as long as you make amends or apologize afterwards.

5. Appreciate the people we care about out loud.

6. Do not treat the people we care about with contempt.

Source

Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Racism without Racists Chapter 1

"There is a strange kind of enigma associated with the problem of racism. No one, or almost no one, wishes to see themselves as racist; still, racism persists, real and tenacious."
—Albert Memmi, Racism


"Color blind racism" -- the rationalization of contemporary racial inequalities by whites to keep racial minorities at "the bottom of the well" (e.g., dark skinned racial minorities have about an eighth of the net worth whites have).

Contemporary racial inequality is perpetuated by new racism practices that are subtle and institutional (e.g., "smiling face discrimination.")

Whites view racism as prejudice; people of color view racism as systemic or institutionalized.

Race is a social construction but it has a social reality.

"Racial structure" is the totality of the social relations and practices that reinforce white privilege. It exists to benefit members of the dominant race.

"Racial ideology" is the framework used by actors to explain and justify (dominant race) or challenge (subordinate race) the racial status quo.

The strength of an ideology lies in its loose-jointed, flexible application -- it allows for contradictions, exceptions, and new information. Ideology is a political instrument, not an exercise in personal logic.

Caveats:
1. Whites are the dominant race but are fractured along class, gender, sexual orientation, and other forms of social cleavage. They have multiple and often contradictory interests.
2. Not every single white person defends the racial status quo but most do.

The goal of this book is to uncover the collective practices that help reinforce the contemporary racial order.

Setting Limits with Children

Children need structure in their lives -- without limits, they may be anxious, unpleasant, and a danger to themselves and others. Children feel more secure and successful when they can operate within known boundaries and routines.

The goal is to teach children to solve problems, make choices, learn to live with the consequences of their choices, and achieve desired behaviors.


Tips:
* Plan the day and tell children what activities will be offered and how they are expected to behave.
* Set a good example.
* Be clear and straightforward. Avoid over-explaining.
* Keep rules simple.
* Limit the amount of rules.
* Stick with the situation at hand.
* Offer specific choices.
* Pick your battles - you do not need to react to everything!
* Offer time-out, divert, and redirect as needed.
* Do not over react.
* Do not act in anger. Wait until you settle down before you settle on a consequence.
* Use phrases that reflect consequences.
* Follow through on your consequences.
* Use positive statements for positive actions.
* Distinguish feelings from behavior. It is okay to be mad, it is not okay to hurt someone.
* Try not to compare children.
* Always focus on the behavior, not on the person.

Specific Situations:
* Public places: Weigh your options and decide what you want to accomplish. Is it more important for you to stick to your rules or to get something done?
* Special events: Adjust activities to attention spans, prepare for transitions, and keep children occupied.

Adapted from a Bananas handout.

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

A Conversation with Asians on Race


10 Questions You Should Ask Your Doctor

1. What is the test for?
2. How many times have you done this procedure?
3. When will I get the results?
4. Why do I need this treatment?
5. Are there any alternatives?
6. What are the possible complications?
7. Which hospital is best for my needs?
8. ow do you spell the name of that drug?
9. Are there any side effects?
10. Will this medicine interact with medicines that I'm already taking?

From The 10 Questions You Should Know. September 2012. Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality, Rockville, MD. http://www.ahrq.gov/patients-consumers/patient-involvement/ask-your-doctor/10questions.htmla

Saturday, April 2, 2016

The April 2 Mark

Personal goals for 4/2/16 - 4/9/16
1. Break a sweat.
2. Be more outgoing. Try to meet new people.
3. Find a local cause to support.

Previously:
1. Drink more water.
2. No caffeine and chocolate after 3 pm.
3. No screens after 10 pm.
4. Spend 30 minutes outside everyday.
5. Stop saying "good job" to my daughter. Use more specific praise instead.
6. Use smile.amazon.com when ordering off of Amazon.
7. Have a conversation with a friend or family member every week.
8. Read a book just for pleasure.
9. Be more forgiving of myself and others.
10. Say "Thank you" more and "I'm sorry" less.
11. Laugh more.
12. Try to understand other people's thinking, especially if they disagree with my own.
13. Create something.
14. Fail. Try to laugh it off afterwards.
15. Spend an hour everyday being present with my wife and daughter.
16. Brush and floss my teeth every night before bed.
17. Go for a walk.
18. Try something out of my comfort zone.
19. No electronics between 10 pm - 7 AM every day.

Things I've Liked this Week

* Savory soy milk (shan dou jiang) recipe on The Woks of Life
* Watching "Finding Vivian Maier" on Netflix
* Making a Flying Captain America Shield for Naveen's 2nd birthday.
* Building two 4x4 raised beds with trellises for vertical gardening using the Square Foot Gardening book.
* Finding out that Jon Stewart has a farm and animal sanctuary in my hometown of Middletown, NJ.
* Using the Duolingo app to learn espanol.