Instructions for Life

Catch the football and make sure you score a touchdown;
jump into the mud and make certain it is enjoyable; rip
your jeans and tear your shirts; bleed on the field of glory
and take it like a man; grind the grass stains into your
clothes; order a hot dog at a baseball game; watch the
Super Bowl and tell everyone about the play in the second
half to prove you watched it; root for the home team; get
hurt but don't cry; hide your emotions; pick yourself up
when you are down; watch violent movies and crave blood
and destruction. This is how to act tough on the outside;
this is how you act in front of the guys. Slick your hair
back with your father's gel just the right way to catch the
eye of the girl next to you; don't burp; act like a gentle-
man; wear clothes that make you look cool; walk a walk
that shows the girls how suave you are; act mature; protect
your sister if she needs help. This is how you act in front of
the girls. Do well in school; get straight A's because you
have to get into a good college. This is how to succeed; this
is how to be prosperous; this is how to be happy and live
life to the fullest.

Brando, age 15
from You Hear Me?